Five-year-old Billy is easy to spot. He is large for his age; his shock of black hair is tousled and dark circles sit beneath his eyes. His little blue plaid shirt is half untucked, and his black sneakers are worn. A bit of breakfast is stuck to his cheek. Billy is seated apart from the other kindergartners, all of whom are scrubbed and shiny looking. The classroom is calm and quiet except for the scratching of yellow pencils on paper.

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Watch this video [2:56] to learn why describing a behavior as “unacceptable” doesn’t help us change it, which is our goal.

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Watch this video [1:13] to learn why Polly thinks twice before sending one of her students down to the office, instead of managing their behavior herself.

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Watch this video [2:33] if you think your Automatic Thoughts can’t totally dominate your actions. To manage a kid’s behavior, you first must have control over your own head.

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